Grandma Carlotta’s Estate Sale

Please join us this Sunday at 1 pm for Grandma Carlotta’s Estate Sale Blowout! 

We aren’t talking an adult diaper blowout here, but even if we were, you have nothing to fear! That’s because Grams’ epic arrangement of burnt orange and chartreuse floral sofas has been lovingly protected by the same custom-made, yellowing plastic covers since the 1970s! Succumb to the pristine seduction of rich ochre tapestries of burnt umber and harvest gold virgin velour. All pieces and prices guaranteed as fresh and flame retardant as the day Grams had them delivered from Levitz in ’72!

Picture it: a misty water-colored memory…Grams is napping to the Price is Right in her matching recliner just mere feet away.

The challenge: silently suctioning your shorts-clad gams off of the plastic-covered sofa to sneak a piece of strawberry hard candy from the candy dish without jarring her awake from her Burt Reynolds dreamscape.

The victory: sweet, sweet, stale sugar to spoil your appetite.

Wouldn’t you like to relive this nostalgia in your own home? Don’t delay! Take home one of Grams’ floral sofas today!** 

P.S.A. You might want to shade your eyes from the glare of your glorious new couch with some goodr NOT YOUR GRANDMA’S COUCH sunnies, designed specifically for protecting your eyes from Grandma’s floral nightmare

*no guarantees that a missing family of cats was not found decomposing underneath furniture

**doilies not included

Introducing…Not Your Grandma’s Couch – a new goodr limited-edition six-pack

Your Gram Gram has (or had, Rest in Peace to all you Big Mamas, we miss you!!!) a couch.  It most likely was floral and…sorry…hideous. This brand new line of sunglasses, NOT YOUR GRANDMA’S COUCH, is, well, not your grandma’s couch.  Nonetheless, these six, hip, floral prints in different shades help us remember our Gigi or Granny Bea or Abuela so you can bring her on your next run or workout! (Unless you grandma is one of the mean ones, then kindly disregard.)